Well hello...so much has happened since I last wrote. Most of it was probably worth writing about: new job, last semester of school, graduating, moving. As I mentioned last time, forgiving God for asking me to change my plans helped, but it didn't take away the pain entirely. I was still hurt; I still needed to heal. Unfortunately, I chose to turn from writing. Writing requires emotion and I didn't really want to deal with my emotions.
Then the scabs turned to scars and the scars began to fade. Winter melted into a very rainy Spring and Spring blossomed into Summer. With projects and finals behind me, I believed I would have time and energy again to write...
During my last semester, I decided to take a public speaking class. I needed the extra credits to fill my schedule and a friend had told me that the class was both fun and easy. This was one of the best recommendations made to me throughout my college career. I learned much about public speaking, but I learned much more about myself.
Nearly every week, we were assigned a different type of speech. We had to give a demonstration, an informative speech, a persuasive one, etc. Though we were assigned the type of speech, we were not assigned topics. I spent several hours in agony each week trying to find anything to share. Each week started the same- I don't know anything, I'm not good at anything, I have nothing new worth sharing.
Yet somehow, by the time class rolled around again, I had a speech prepared.
The instructor told us every week that we had a gift and she was merely helping us find a way to share it. I didn't believe her until the last week when I had a chance to look back and realize that I had found something worth sharing for every single speech.
When I finally found the emotional strength to write, I thought I had nothing worth writing about. I had graduated, but so had thousands of other students. Millions of people across America wake up every morning and head off to work, eight hours sitting at a computer. I was doing what everyone else was doing - so why bother writing about it.
Today, I remembered what Public Speaking taught me. I have a gift to share. My mundane schedule is experienced through a unique perspective which no one else will ever have. I see each day with a different attitude, I speak to new people, and I strengthen relationships which wouldn't exist if I weren't here to be a part of them.
I haven't written because I believed I had nothing to say... I was wrong.
