Continuing with my goal to read the standard works, I have finished the Book of Mormon. (For an explanation of this goal- see The Old Testament post)
I'm a little behind where I should be (If my calculations are correct, I should have finished it last week), but I'm not so far behind that I can't get caught up. Besides, I've got Thanksgiving and Christmas Break coming up soon. With no homework or midterms to worry about, I'm sure I'll get a lot of reading done.
I really love this book. Through the Book of Mormon, my faith in Christ grows, regardless of how many times I've read it. The teachings of this book help me to find a sense of peace that is difficult to find in the hustle and bustle of today's society. Here are a few of the versus that really touched me as I read.
3rd Nephi 5:13 "Behold, I am a disciple of Jesus Christ, the Son of God. I have been called of him to declare his word among his people, that they might have everlasting life."
During the 18 months of my mission, this was probably my favorite verse in the Book of Mormon. As a missionary, you can really feel those words fill you up. Since I've been home, I've been seeking ways to feel just as filled with these words. I came home from the Philippines, that's all that changed. I'm still a disciple of Jesus Christ. Therefore, I have the opportunity to share His gospel with others that they might have everlasting life.
Ether 12:37 "...And because though hast seen thy weakness though shalt be made strong,..."
This is just a small fragment of the verse, but the words mean a lot. People commonly quote Ether 12:27, which teaches about our weaknesses being given to us to help humble us and that through Christ, we can become strong. I find the promise in verse 37 hits a little closer to home. Christ does make us stronger, but He can only help us to change that which we are trying to change. I excel in seeing my own weaknesses. This verse reminds me that I have to see them before I can work with the Lord to change them. He promises that, as long as I rely on him, every weakness that I see in myself can become a strength.
I know this book to be true and I invite anyone who struggles to feel at peace to read this book and turn to the Lord. He will give you peace.
Wednesday, November 6, 2013
Sunday, November 3, 2013
Pinay pa ang kalug ko.
Translation: My soul is still Filipino.
(as a side note, kalug is a really fun word when you are talking quickly in Hiligaynon about the soul. The whole conversation sounds like it's taking place next to an old broken machine.)
As I ate dinner today, I unexpectedly had a strong urge to eat rice with my noodles and shrimp. Almost 18 months ago, having recently returned from the Philippines, where they eat rice with every meal, this would have been an expected desire. It's been quite a while since then, so I was rather surprised when I stopped and looked at my bowl of food and debated if it needed rice. My skin is white, my hair is red, but every now and then I'm reminded that a part of my soul will forever be Filipino.
Now, as funny as this is, the experience turned me back to thoughts of my mission. Even almost 18 months later, the Filipino part of my soul speaks up. I'm reminded how I have changed, not just in terms of my appetite and my desire to speak Hiligaynon, but in who I am and my faith in the Lord. The 18 months I spent in the Philippines helped teach me how much the Lord loves me. I learned that He will always be there to help me when I feel like the road is too difficult. I discovered that though I feel small and weak, I can still be an instrument in His hands, especially since most of what He wants me to do are just small, simple things that can change another person's life.
I'm so grateful that my soul will forever be a little Filipino, that I will want rice whenever I eat fish, and that I long to eat mangoes for breakfast. These things helped me become who I am, and you know what, I like who I am.
(as a side note, kalug is a really fun word when you are talking quickly in Hiligaynon about the soul. The whole conversation sounds like it's taking place next to an old broken machine.)
As I ate dinner today, I unexpectedly had a strong urge to eat rice with my noodles and shrimp. Almost 18 months ago, having recently returned from the Philippines, where they eat rice with every meal, this would have been an expected desire. It's been quite a while since then, so I was rather surprised when I stopped and looked at my bowl of food and debated if it needed rice. My skin is white, my hair is red, but every now and then I'm reminded that a part of my soul will forever be Filipino.
Now, as funny as this is, the experience turned me back to thoughts of my mission. Even almost 18 months later, the Filipino part of my soul speaks up. I'm reminded how I have changed, not just in terms of my appetite and my desire to speak Hiligaynon, but in who I am and my faith in the Lord. The 18 months I spent in the Philippines helped teach me how much the Lord loves me. I learned that He will always be there to help me when I feel like the road is too difficult. I discovered that though I feel small and weak, I can still be an instrument in His hands, especially since most of what He wants me to do are just small, simple things that can change another person's life.
I'm so grateful that my soul will forever be a little Filipino, that I will want rice whenever I eat fish, and that I long to eat mangoes for breakfast. These things helped me become who I am, and you know what, I like who I am.
Saturday, November 2, 2013
A Reason To Hope
I had an epiphany today- I have a reason to hope.
I know this seems silly, but for some reason, I've spent a long time trying to convince myself that I had no reason to hope. I had felt like anything I ever hoped for, dreamed about, or aspired to turned out to be nothing at all. So I tried to stop letting myself hope. For a while, it wasn't hard. I could find nothing to hope for and therefore never had to stop myself from hoping in something. (Note: I don't recommend this, life is far more grand if you hope, even if you're just hoping in something silly, like no snow until after your birthday).
Suddenly, I was offered a reason to hope. Having come with no warning, I found it difficult to convince myself not to believe in it. I tried to tell myself that I was just seeing things, that I noticed positive because I wanted to see positive. In vain, I repeated over and over that these "good omens" I was picking up weren't real. I told myself over and over to give up and stop "pretending" that something good might happen.
... and it didn't work. I'm so glad it didn't work. Something in me fought back, shouting that there was a reason to hope and that good things happen and that the fear holding me back would go away if only I stopped pretending that there was no reason to hope. And I finally see it. It had to stand in front of me, stare me in the face, and slap me upside the head in order to see it, but I do. I have a huge reason to hope, because life is good and life gets better.
I know this seems silly, but for some reason, I've spent a long time trying to convince myself that I had no reason to hope. I had felt like anything I ever hoped for, dreamed about, or aspired to turned out to be nothing at all. So I tried to stop letting myself hope. For a while, it wasn't hard. I could find nothing to hope for and therefore never had to stop myself from hoping in something. (Note: I don't recommend this, life is far more grand if you hope, even if you're just hoping in something silly, like no snow until after your birthday).
Suddenly, I was offered a reason to hope. Having come with no warning, I found it difficult to convince myself not to believe in it. I tried to tell myself that I was just seeing things, that I noticed positive because I wanted to see positive. In vain, I repeated over and over that these "good omens" I was picking up weren't real. I told myself over and over to give up and stop "pretending" that something good might happen.
... and it didn't work. I'm so glad it didn't work. Something in me fought back, shouting that there was a reason to hope and that good things happen and that the fear holding me back would go away if only I stopped pretending that there was no reason to hope. And I finally see it. It had to stand in front of me, stare me in the face, and slap me upside the head in order to see it, but I do. I have a huge reason to hope, because life is good and life gets better.
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