Walking Away

September 11, 2011

To be totally honest, this week went from hard to heart breaking, and then picked up at the end to be a pretty decent. It was probably the longest week of my mission from Monday to Friday, and then Saturday and Sunday flew by faster than I can blink. Here's the day by day experiences:

Monday: A fairly typical p-day consisting of laundry, writing letters, and doing grocery shopping. Upon getting home we were greeted by all the sisters who were preparing to go home that week (the spend the nights at our house on Monday and Tuesday Night). Their desire and excitement to go home filled the house with a tangible weight that caused the hours to drag on. They also had the mindset of being done with their missions and stressed about luggage weights, so they stayed up late reorganizing stuff. I have trouble sleeping when people are wandering around the house.

Tuesday: Started off with the same heavy weight and an additional exhaustion due to a lack of effective sleep. We went to a district meeting as a tatlo (3) because the other companionship in our apartment had a sister who was going home so she was at the "going away workshops" all day. Her companion, who always tries her best to be cheerful, was very sad because it was her favorite companion and having a companion go home is just difficult. In addition, the work was a bit more difficult. Most of our appointments weren't home, so despite trying our hardest, we didn't have very many lessons.

Wednesday: The sisters who were going home finally went home, we helped them drag their suitcases out to the street where the elders packed them into the van, then went back to being missionaries. This day, like Tuesday, was difficult for the work and we were working as a tatlo for the whole day, making lessons longer but making conversations fun. We made plans as a trisome for the transfer ahead of us because we heard a rumor that the three of us were staying in the area and the two areas were being combined (three sisters went home, no new ones came, so some areas had to be combined for the transfer). Wednesday ended with the text that I wished I never received: Transfer announcements informing me that I was leaving the area. Only two transfers- two transfers with amazing companions and lots of hard work and lots of success that I was excited to see in the third transfer, and I was told I wasn't going to get it. Completely heartbreaking, especially as I realized that most of those investigators who I had grown to be good friends wouldn't be visited again the next day and I wouldn't get a chance to say good bye. I was terrified as well, knowing that with that transfer and who else was transferring- I was probably going to Antique, one of the areas with a different language. It was very very hard to sleep that night. After everything I'd worked for, I was being asked to walk away, and I really didn't think I could do it.

Thursday: The morning consisted of packing, and stressing. The afternoon was another fall-through day where we didn't get to visit any investigators except for one, who started balling when I told her that I was leaving. We instead visited members to let them know I was leaving and doing are best to find new investigators for the next sisters to teach. Thursday night was once again sleepless as I stressed about what I hadn't finished packing and wondered what the next transfer would bring.

Friday: Transfer day. I learned I was in fact going to Antique. Spent 2 and a half hours on a bus stressing about going to Antique, and trying to hold back tears as the bus passed through Oton and I said a silent good bye to that wonderful town. Yet I was filled with a sure sense that I was really needed where I was going. I knew somehow that the work that needed to be done where I was going was something that I really needed to do. I also learned from other missionaries that Karay-a wasn't too difficult to learn and that most people there know Hiligaynon, a great comfort.

Saturday: First full day in the area. My new companion, Sister McBride, is amazing and we've got great goals for the weeks ahead of us. Though transferring was difficult and heartbreaking, I've been blessed with a great area and a great companion and we've got lots of work we are excited to do this transfer.

Sunday: Meeting members, attending church, and having an opportunity to remember my ASL because there are a lot of very strong members here who are deaf, they are so fun and have such a strong spirit. The days are speeding up again and I'm trying to work my hardest to keep up as they fly past.

Crazy week, huh?